Carry Me Home
by kate-7h
Summary: As he travels with his new found family, Syaoran remembers the man who had rescued him from the rain, and the life he had with him. The story of Syaoran being raised by Fujitaka. (Syaoran/Sakura and slight Kurogane/Fai).
1. Prologue

_Be it in thought, or on the wind_.

 **A/N** : So I wrote this for father's day, always in the back of my mind all the great father figures in this series and nearly changed everything in here like five times. But I stuck with my original plan! I wanted Fujitaka raising Syaoran story! Yes! And in flashbacks because I missed Fai and Kurogane writing this without them. Which means I'm letting Syaoran indulge in his problematic habit of getting way carried away with flashbacks.

* * *

The sun was beginning to lower in the sky, casting warm light and strange shadows across their campsite. It had been a long day, following seemingly endless dead end leads up mountains, the afternoon impossibly hot. Honestly, it reminded Syaoran a lot of growing up, excavating and exploring in any and all climates. There was a lot of vegetation here though, so it didn't look much like Clow, the place where he had spent most of his time. The trees seemed to go on for miles, as far as they had been able to see from the top of the mountain. The plant life made the air muggy, and there hadn't been much wind that day, so it was stagnant.

As much as Syaoran wanted to find Sakura's feather, he wanted her and everyone else to be rested and healthy. And the feather hadn't even been up there. They'd hiked up to that old monastery for nothing, just some old cobwebs and dust. There had been some really interesting looking books, although they were written in a language Syaoran couldn't read. There hadn't been any drawings in them either or on the old tapestries to indicate there was a feather, so they moved on. It was somewhere in the area, though. Mokona had sensed it.

 _We'll find it tomorrow_ , Syaoran thought confidently. This was a peaceful place, and it didn't seem like anyone was using the feather for evil or mischief. The only urgency was getting them back to Sakura to restore her memories and bring back her strength, but it would do no good to restore such strength if she didn't rest and maintain her health naturally.

"Fai's making soup!" The little magical creature squaked in his face suddenly, jarring him from his thoughts. She stomped her feet happily on the top of his head. "Soup soup soup!"

They were camping again, blankets rolled out around a firepit they'd dug and lined with rocks (for safety precaution). Fai was crouched next to it with a pot he'd gotten at the market, as well as various vegetables and meats he intended on cooking in it. He stirred the contents, chatting merrily to Sakura, who was trying to peel a potato with a knife.

"Like this?" Sakura asked when Fai finished his story. (Something about large, mythical beasts in the snowy tundra.) She angled the knife, slicing off the thin strip of skin.

"You're a natural, Sakura-chan! And when you're done with peeling them, we'll chop them up really small."

Sakura nodded. "Right!"

Syaoran came over and sat beside them. "Do you need help with anything else, Fai-san?"

Fai smiled brightly. "You can help Sakura-chan with the vegetables. Such hard workers, these children. So much like their daddy, huh?"

Mokona bounced up into the air and landed on Kurogane's head. "Kuro-daddy is such a good father!"

"What'd you call me?!" Kurogane fumed, dropping the bundle of wood he'd had in his arms to grab at the magical creature.

With another smile, Fai held out a knife towards Syaoran. "Why don't you cut up the potatoes after Sakura-chan peels them, okay?"

"Alright," Syaoran replied, turning an amused smile at Sakura, which she returned happily. It was strange and silly the way Fai talked like they were a family, and it really didn't feel untrue. They looked out for each other and protected each other. Syaoran didn't want to think of how this journey would've gone if Kurogane and Fai both weren't there. He, and probably Sakura as well, would've been dead long ago.

Syaoran shuddered away from the thought and continued to work on a potato.

"This is a nice country, isn't it?" Syaoran said.

Sakura nodded. "Everyone we've met has been so kind. I hope we can stay for a while."

"Much kinder than the last country we were in, yeah?" Fai mused as he plopped Syaoran's chopped up potatoes into the broth.

"Yeah…" Syaoran said. The last place hadn't been incredibly pleasant. And they hadn't even gotten a feather out of it.

"Just because it seems nice, don't let your guard." Kurogane moved the stack of wood to the other side of the fire.

"But we can't have our guard up _all_ the time, Kuro-pi! Such a brute, never letting anyone relax!" Fai whined, his shoulders seemingly going limp in a dramatic shrug.

Kurogane tched. "You're always relaxed."

"Let's relax, Kuro-daddy!" Mokona chirped, marching on his hair.

"Don't just stomp on people's heads!" Kurogane yelled, grabbing Mokona and squashing her between his hands.

"Ah! Kurogane is such a monster!" Mokona cried. "Mokona was wrong, Kurogane is a terrible father!"

"Who're you calling father?!"

Sakura laughed beside him, pulling Syaoran's attention away from Kurogane. He smiled at her laughing face, then looked back at the potatoes on his board. _This is good_ , he thought. _Everything will be alright if I have them with me_.

He smiled at his thoughts, reminded of the first time he'd thought something like that. Looking up at the kind face who'd rescued him from the rain.

Since he hadn't known any language whatsoever, immediately after becoming Syaoran's foster father, Fujitaka worked hard to teach him everything he knew. Which really was a lot of knowledge. Not that Syaoran minded in the least; even back when he was a small child he had a thirst for knowledge. Fujitaka had indeed been a good fit for him.

His toes barely brushed the ground underneath the chair he sat in, the large book covering his entire lap with it's heavy pages.

"Fujitaka-san, uh… how do you say this?" Syaoran asked timidly of the man who was sitting at the desk in the cramped apartment space.

Fujitaka smiled and knelt down beside the chair. "Which one?"

Mutely, Syaoran pointed to the character on the page which eluded him.

"Oh," Fujitaka said. "This one reads 'astronomical.' Do you understand what the author is talking about in this passage?"

Syaoran bit his lip. It hadn't been long since he'd learned how to read and write in this language Fujitaka had taught him to speak in. He still had some trouble with the more complicated and less used words. Dejected, he shook his head. "Not very much. I'm sorry."

With another smile, Fujitaka gently tipped Syaoran's face up to look him in the eye. "It's completely alright, Syaoran-kun. You'll get there, I'm positive. Some words and phrases are trickier than others."

Fujitaka gestured down to the passage Syaoran had been attempting to read. "This passage is explaining how this civilization used the study of the skies and stars to create maps. So they always knew where they were if someone were to get lost, for example. It's really quite fascinating."

Syaoran nodded, looking at the words again, then the small pictures between the passages. "So they were studying science thousands of years ago?"

"Yes, although not all that much of it was understood as it is today. They were just starting out in their discoveries." His face softened as he looked at the boy. He brought his hand up, placing it on top of Syaoran's head. "There will always be new discoveries, no matter what field you study. All it takes is constant effort, and a little bit of help here and there. If we do that, then we can always learn the new things this amazing world has to offer us."

Although his words were indirect, Syaoran understood the meaning. He looked down at the book again with determination. "I'll do my best to learn the hard words. I promise."

Fujitaka laughed softly, ruffling the child's hair. "See that you do. And remember that I'll always be here to help you, all you need to do is ask, alright?"

The boy nodded once more. "I will."

 _Everything will be alright_ , Syaoran thought to himself, smiling away the memory of cold loneliness in the rain.

"Syaoran-kun?"

Syaoran blinked, being brought back to the present. Sakura was holding a potato out to him.

"Oh sorry," he replied with a smile, taking it from her hand.

"You seemed pretty deep in thought," she said, drawing his attention back to her.

"Huh? Uh- yeah… I was thinking about... my dad," Syaoran said, setting his knife to the vegetable.

"Oh," Sakura smiled. "Was it a good thought?"

Syaoran returned her smile. "It was."

They were quiet for a moment. Well, he and Sakura were. Fai found some little thing to poke at Kurogane, prodding until his shouting echoed in the forest. Mokona did her best to aid Fai in the effort, of course. It was pretty funny a lot of the time, well once Syaoran had figured out that it _was_ playful. At first he wasn't sure why Fai insisted on behaving the way he did with Kurogane. Once he'd figured it out, it was much more amusing.

"You don't really talk about yourself that much, Syaoran-kun," Sakura said after a moment.

"Eh?"

She smiled. "I don't really know anything about you from before this journey. So, it's nice to know you have a kind father."

Syaoran blinked. "Uh… h-how could you tell he was kind?"

"You smiled," she replied simply.

He felt himself blushing as he looked back to his work. "Yeah…"

If the world was the it should've been, Sakura wouldn't have even needed to ask him about his life before their journey; she already knew everything there was to know about him. She knew Fujitaka, she didn't need to guess if he was kind. She was supposed to already know.

Fai came over, touching his shoulder lightly. On his face was a kind smile. "Are you finished up then?"

"Yes, we can start on the carrots if you want?" Syaoran replied, but Fai shook his head.

"I think Sakura-chan and I can manage the rest, could you go get some more water from the stream? We'll purify it while we make dinner."

Syaoran stood up, grateful for the distraction Fai provided. "Sure, I'll go get it right away."

"Thanks!" Fai sang, handing him the container.

The day was warm even in the evening, but the shade of the trees provided some cool relief on his shoulders and arms. It was nice to walk around alone for a little bit. Of course he thoroughly enjoyed and cared for his companions, but there wasn't much time for any of them to have their own space to think.

Those thoughts he had were in the past for the most part. Specifically his father and that cold day in the rain.

* * *

Syaoran's feet were bare and soaked in the rain. He had no memory from before that day, the earliest memory he had was waking up at the side of the road, covered in bandages and all alone, the sky pouring down on him relentlessly. He'd made his way into the nearby town, half walking, half crawling for how many times he'd stumbled. Sometimes Syaoran wondered how he'd gotten there at the side of that road alone. Had he been abandoned? Did his birth parents leave him there, nameless and empty?

Tripping again, he stumbled into another puddle. Back the, he hadn't been used to the lack of perception his blind eye left him with. It had been hard to see, especially with the rain obstructing his vision in his left eye.

One of the worst things was that he was unable to understand the words of the people around him. A woman leaned down, asking him something in garbled language and a seemingly angry tone. When he hadn't responded, she left. For the most part, no one spoke to him, only looked on or deliberately away from him. Some looked at him sadly, others with their faces twisted and strange. Syaoran hadn't known what to think of their pity and disgust, he didn't even understand what it meant. Instead, he just curled in on himself against the side of a building, shivering against the cold rain, not knowing what to do next. He would've cried, had he known what that was. Instead, he sat blank faced, staring out at the people as they hurried past him.

Suddenly a heavy cloth was draped over him. Syaoran looked up in surprise at the man who was crouched down in front of him. This man's face seemed… warmer than the other faces he'd seen; his mouth turned up at the corners pleasantly. Syaoran resisted the urge to touch him, to see if his face was as warm as it seemed.

"You must be cold," the man's words had been incomprehensible to Syaoran at the time, but looking back, he heard them with the knowledge of what the sounds meant. "Let me take you somewhere dry. You'll be safe."

Looked up at the man, Syaoran didn't resist as he led the him out of the rain. The whole while, he hoped the man wouldn't leave him, fearing he would left alone to sit in the rain again.

* * *

 **A/** **N:** Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this! I'll have the next chapter up next week! (more likely than not…) Reviews would be wonderful~


	2. Fujitaka

**A/N** : Chapter 2! It's a little late, I meant to have it up yesterday. Sorry! I hope you enjoy this chapter! I enjoyed writing it!

* * *

"Tomorrow would you like to help me at the dig site?"

Syaoran looked up from the book he was reading. "What?"

Fujitaka smiled down at him. "If you want, I can teach you how to dig like an archeologist. Is that something you'd like to learn?"

He stood up, excitement suddenly filling him. "Yes, Fujitaka-san."

With a laugh, Fujitaka patted the boy's head. "Your thirst for knowledge is truly refreshing, Syaoran-kun."

He shrugged a little, not really sure how to respond. They were out in the middle of no where right now; it had taken them hours in rickety vehicles to get out to this specific spot in the desert. The air was dry and hot, unlike the place where Fujitaka had found him. Or perhaps it was just the changing seasons. It had only been six months, but that was during the rainy season, he supposed.

This location was apparently the burial site of an ancient civilization, long since covered by layer upon layer of sand and earth. Everyone he'd heard talking about it was incredibly excited, saying what an important find it was, if their information was correct and this was in fact the place.

"Fujitaka-san?" Syaoran asked, concern in his mind now.

"Yes, Syaoran-kun?"

He looked out the tent flap at the site beside them, the air cooling as the sun sank. "You're in charge of this excavation. Won't it take away from your important work teaching me?"

Fujitaka was quiet for a moment, then crouched down in front of the boy and placed his hands on his shoulders. "There's nothing more important for me to do than to teach you everything I can."

"Why?" Syaoran asked.

He smiled. "Because I'm your foster father, and you're my responsibility. I want you to be happy and have everything you need."

Syaoran blinked, then nodded. Fujitaka smiled again, then stood and ruffled his hair once more.

"Why don't you help me make some dinner, okay?"

"Okay," Syaoran agreed, happy to do something.

They didn't have much of a kitchen, as they lived in a tent currently. There was a small gas-powered stove with one burner, so most of their meal was raw fruits and vegetables, and they had to make the rice and then the meat. It took longer than it would've with the actually kitchen they'd had in Fujitaka's rented apartment Syaoran have lived with him in first, but it was fine.

As he stirred the sliced meat in the pan, he thought about what Fujitaka had said. It was true, Fujitaka was his foster father. He was bound by law to care for and provide for Syaoran, and he'd agreed to that. It made sense. What didn't make sense was why he'd done it. Sure Fujitaka had found him in the rain that day. But just finding him didn't mean he had to take on the responsibility of becoming his guardian. Fujitaka's work was demanding, and he hardly had the means or time to take care of himself, why had he decided to take Syaoran in?

It really didn't make sense to the boy, but he kept his thoughts to himself for now.

* * *

"Alright, you don't want to make it much deeper than five centimeters for now. That's this mark here," Fujitaka explained, pointing to the number on the ruler. Syaoran nodded firmly in response.

Fujitaka smiled at him, then bent to place his trowel against the ground, gently scraping the soil from the surface. He worked within a single square of the grid tied in twine over the dig site. Syaoran watched for a few minutes, taking in how hard he pressed, the movements of his hands and arms as he dug. It was slow, methodically done so Syaoran figured he wouldn't have much trouble imitating it.

After a while, Fujitaka straightened and handed the flat-edged trowel Syaoran. "Why don't you try it out? Can you do it the way I showed you?"

"Yes," Syaoran said, taking on the task with determination. He knelt down next to Fujitaka and placed the trowel in the dirt, as Fujitaka had done. He swallowed dryly, glancing nervously at the man before digging. He tried hard to dig evenly, although the dry dirt was a lot harder than he'd anticipated. It was harder to make his scoops line up exactly right. He frowned, trying not to feel his flushed ears as he tried hard to get it right.

Fujitaka seemed to pick up on his stress and touched a hand to his shoulder. "You're doing well, and with practice and time you'll be completely comfortable doing such a task."

Syaoran nodded, wiping a hand across his brow.

"I have some work I need to do inside. Are you alright to do this without me for a little while?"

The boy nodded again, firmly holding the shovel in his hands.

"Dig five centimeters deep the way I showed you, then when you've finished this square come and get me, alright? Oh and make sure you keep your hat on, I don't want you to get sunburnt."

"Right," Syaoran said, then crouched to work on his square. Fujitaka stood, patting his head, hat included, then walked off in the direction of the tents.

The sun was hot as it beat on his back, but he ignored it. He had a task to do and he wanted to do it to the best of his ability. So that Fujitaka would think he did a good job. It took a long time, as the ground was so hard, and it didn't get much easier underneath the top layer. If it took him this long with just half a grid square, he wondered how long it would take until they actually reached the burial site beneath them. Probably a lot longer than he'd figured, which meant a lot more days in the desert with nothing but the supplies they'd brought with them.

Syaoran dug slowly and tried to be careful, scraping the dirt from the hard ground and placing it on the large cloth beside him. When he was finally done with the square, the edges weren't nearly as straight, nor the bottom as even as he wanted them to be. Some parts dipped down deeper that the five centimeters he was directed to dig. He frowned, grabbing up handfuls of dirt and packing them back into place, smoothing out the surface.

"Hey kid, what're you doing?" Someone asked from above him. Syaoran started, looking up as the man loomed over him. The man crouched down, his scratchy beard and bushy eyebrows reminding him of the bears he'd read about in one of Fujitaka's books. Syaoran stood, swallowing dryly as he gripped his trowel tightly. He'd never seen or fought a bear, but he figured he had a better chance if he were on his feet.

The man just laughed, holding up his hands. "God, kid, calm down! I ain't gonna hurt ya. I was just lookin' to see why you were putting the dirt back into the hole. It's supposed to be the other way, ya know."

Syaoran blinked, staring at the man. "It wasn't level."

He stared back at Syaoran for a moment, then laughed harder, wrinkles crinkling his sun-browned skin. "It doesn't have to be perfect! And by the looks of it, you did a pretty good job for a kid just starting out."

Syaoran looked back to the square. "My… foster father… told me to dig five centimeters down."

"You're Fujitaka's boy, right?"

His eyes met the man's once more, taking in the strange color; brown? Or was it green? The sun made it hard to tell. "Yes."

The man sat down next to where Syaoran stood, scratching at his beard as he looked closer at Syaoran's work. "It's actually okay to go a little deeper at this point; ten centimeters max on removing a layer. He probably just told you the minimum because you're learnin', ya think?"

Syaoran considered this. It was logical. If he's managed to make some sort of major mistake in his lack of know-how, doing the minimum would lessen the damage. He nodded thoughtfully.

"What's your name, kid?"

"Syaoran."

The man smiled, then held out a hand towards him. "I'm Verne."

Syaoran stared at the hand, feeling like he was supposed to do something, but he didn't know what. Verne smirked from behind his beard and reached out, grabbing Syaoran's opposite hand and shook. "That's a handshake. Where I'm from, this is what you do when you meet new people."

"Oh," Syaoran said, intrigued. _Cultural difference_. "Where do you come from?"

"A country almost half the world away. Haven't been home in years," Verne said, smiling for some reason.

Syaoran found it strange. Was it happy for him to be away from his home? He wanted to ask why it was, or what his home was like, or why he'd travelled so far away from it. Having a home, shouldn't you treasure it, as the characters did in stories? He wanted to ask all of his questions, but he knew it was impolite to be so intrusive.

Homes were important, weren't they? If Verne had one, why did he leave? Syaoran frowned, thinking of his own predicament. Had he had a home? A family? Why had he left? Was it forced or of his own volition? He couldn't fathom why. These questions ran around his mind often, though he could never reveal any answers.

It wasn't that he wasn't content with his life with Fujitaka, and all that Fujitaka selflessly gave to him, he was. But every person came from somewhere, people didn't just appear from nothing. This man hadn't started existing once Syaoran had seen him, and he wouldn't disappear once he took his eyes off him. Syaoran was sure he had a past of his own, even if he couldn't remember. He hadn't just started his existence that night in the rain. That's not how life worked, he knew it.

"Hey kid? You in there?"

Syaoran was jarred from his thoughts, looking up at the man in confusion.

"Were you spacing off?" Verne asked.

"Spacing off?" Syaoran replied, even more confused at the phrase.

"Yeah, ya know, not paying attention, getting lost in thought- aw forget it. Say, let's go find Fujitaka and show him your good work."

"Uh- yes, Verne-san." Syaoran nodded, then followed after Verne as he headed towards the tents.

Inside, Fujitaka was pouring over some papers spread across the table. There was also a woman inside, talking with him and pointing to a spot on the papers. Syaoran found himself staring at her, taking in her dark-colored skin tone. He was fairly certain it was too dark to have just been caused simply by sun exposure. Syaoran had never seen anything like it, and he decided that it was very pretty.

In her hands was a strange contraption, mechanical in make with gears and glass and metal. Syaoran felt intensely curious as to what it was. It didn't look dirty or old, so he assumed it wasn't an artifact. It seemed like it was some sort of tool, but it wasn't shaped like it was meant for digging, so he had no idea what it was used for.

"Hey, Fujitaka, Chimme, how's it going?" Verne said, greeting the two.

"Good morning, Verne," the woman, Chimme replied with a smile. "And who do you have here?"

Syaoran looked up at her, then nervously glanced at Fujitaka. He smiled and walked over. "That's my son, Syaoran."

Syaoran felt confused at the address. _His son?_ He supposed Fujitaka was his foster father, but didn't that make him Fujitaka's foster son? It seemed… not the same sort of relationship to leave off the prefixing word.

"Oh, it's nice to meet you, Syaoran," Chimme said with a wave.

He didn't know what to say, so he just bowed low to her, which earned him a soft laugh and a bow in return.

"I didn't know you had a child, Fujitaka," Chimme said curiously.

"I recently adopted him," Fujitaka replied. "A decision I'm pretty happy with. Now..."

He leaned down, smiling at Syaoran. "Did you come to tell me you finished your square?"

Syaoran nodded mutely, still holding the trowel in his hands.

"Stoic kid you got there, Fujitaka," Verne said with a laugh as he strode over to the table of papers.

"Yes, I suppose," Fujitaka replied, patting Syaoran's shoulder. "Shall we go have a look?"

Syaoran looked back to the others in the tent, then to Fujitaka with a nod. "Okay."

They walked back to the dig site and Fujitaka crouched down in front of Syaoran's work, examining it with the ruler.

"Good job, Syaoran-kun! You did very well for your first try. If you want, you could dig more squares. Or you can play. Whichever you want to do."

"I'll dig," Syaoran said determinedly. "I want to help."

Fujitaka smiled. "Thank you, Syaoran-kun." He stood up and moved to return to the tent. "I'll come get you when I have lunch ready, okay?"

"Okay… uh, Fujitaka-san?" Syaoran asked before he walked away.

Fujitaka turned back. "Yes?"

"Why… why did you call me your son?"

A serious look drew over Fujitaka's face as he knelt down in front of the boy. "Because I adopted you as my child, and intend to care for you as a parent. If you're uncomfortable with that, I won't address you as such. It's your choice."

Syaoran tilted his head at the man. "I'm not uncomfortable. I just don't understand."

The smile on Fujitaka's face seemed sad as he touched his shoulder again. "I hope I will be able to help you understand in time."

Syaoran didn't want Fujitaka to be sad, so he placed his own hand on Fujitaka's shoulder, trying to reciprocate the comforting gesture. Although he didn't really know what to say in response.

"O-okay," he finally said and Fujitaka's smile widened.

"Okay. Are you gonna be alright while I go back to work?"

"Yes," he replied with a nod and picked up his trowel again.

"I'll come get you when it's lunchtime, okay?"

Fujitaka had said this already, but Syaoran simply nodded again. "Okay."

Syaoran spent the better part of the rest of the day digging as many squares as he could manage. With each new one, he felt more and more comfortable with the task, becoming easier and quicker than the last. Every once in a while Verne came over to give him some tips, which he was grateful for. It was a lot more fun to feel like he was doing something useful, rather than just being off by himself.

"Are you done with this section, little one?" A voice said from above him. Syaoran looked up to see Chimme, the woman from inside the tent. She still had that strange contraption, now hanging from a strap around her neck. In her hands was a bound book and a pencil.

Syaoran quickly stood and greeted her with a bow. "Y-yes."

She laughed, looking over the couple of squares he'd finished. "How old are you?"

He took a breath, then shook his head uncomfortably.

"You don't want to tell me or you don't know?" she asked, her voice kind.

"I- I don't know," his face flushing.

She turned her eyes back to his work and scratched her pencil onto a page of her book. "Well, you look to be around six or seven is my guess. Although you might be small for your age. Your name is Syaoran, yes?"

"Yes," Syaoran affirmed, confused as to why she was asking him, since Fujitaka had already told her.

She just smiled. "My name is Chimwemwe, but you can call me Chimme if that's too hard."

He nodded, considering the foreignness of her name. Maybe she was from a different country than the one Fujitaka was from, just like Verne. He decided not to ask her about it though, figuring she'd bring it up on her own if she wanted to talk about it. Instead, he watched as her pencil moved across the book in her hands. Every few seconds or so, she'd look up at his work, then back down to the page.

After some minutes, she looked back down at him with another smile. "Do you want to see?"

He wasn't sure what she'd been doing, so he nodded again as she crouched, turning the open book to him. On the page she'd recreated what his freshly dug squares looked like, the grooves and bumps of the dirt were roughly shaded and highlighted with lots of lines of pencil strokes. Curious, he reached out and turned the pages back to see the previous pages, each square drawn was marked by it's set number.

"That's amazing," Syaoran said with awe.

"Thank you," Chimme replied with a grin. She left the book in her hands and stood, lifting the contraption around her neck to her face. She pointed the strange, accordion front to the ground, and with a click a bright flash erupted from it. Syaoran blinked at the purple dots left in his vision from the flash. _What is that?_ He thought, staring at the strange flashing object.

Her fingers clicked the mechanism once more, making it flash again. Then she let the machine back to hang around her neck and she took the book back from him.

Chimme looked down at him and his bewildered face, then laughed. "Have you never seen a camera before?"

If he had he didn't remember. Syaoran shook his head. "What is it?"

"It's a device that takes photographs of things."

"Photographs?"

"Yes," she nodded, then pointed her finger to the back of the camera. "In here it captures the image of, say, this work area. Then it imprints that image onto a filmstrip so I can transfer the image onto photographic paper."

"How do you do that?" Syaoran asked, curiosity making him want to find every book accessible about cameras.

"Well, it quite a process to just explain. How bout I just show you later, if that's alright with your father."

Syaoran blinked at the word, then looked down at his feet. "My… father..."

It was still strange to think. A person's father was someone who they shared blood with. All Syaoran shared with Fujitaka was a living space. He didn't know how he felt about putting such a label on this relationship with Fujitaka. But Fujitaka had called him his son… Feelings were hard to describe, even in his own mind. What did it feel like to have a father? What did he feel with Fujitaka? He didn't know.

He looked up at Chimme with a serious face. "May I ask a question, Chimme-san?"

Her head tilted up, amusement crossing her face. "Alright."

"W-what does it mean to have a father?"

Chimme raised an eyebrow, looking down at him with intrigue, and maybe a touch of pity. Syaoran fidgeted, not knowing why he had asked her this. He'd just barely met her.

"What do you mean by that, little one?"

"Uh…" Syaoran stuttered. What _did_ he mean by that? What did it feel like to have a father? What should he feel towards Fujitaka? Is Fujitaka his father, even though he didn't actually father him? "N-nevermind. I'm sorry."

Chimme smiled kindly as she leaned down in front of him. "My father always told me that good people learn that being a parent is to turn selfishness into selflessness. Now, if you're concerned about this, perhaps this is a conversation you should have with Fujitaka, no?"

Syaoran looked up at her, then nodded. "T-thank you, Chimme-san."

She stood once more with a ruffle to his hair. "No problem. Now I'm gonna finish up before it gets too dark. See you later!"

He waved as she walked to a different part of the dig. With a glance at the sinking sun, Syaoran hurried back to the tent he and Fujitaka shared.

* * *

As the weeks went by, Syaoran read and learned everything he could get his hands on. Of course, it helped that so many of their company wanted to help him do that. With the assistance of Fujitaka and Verne and Chimme and many others in the company, Syaoran became pretty adept at the skills needed to excavate; digging, cataloging, cleaning the artifacts that had been found (although that was under close supervision). He'd even began to try to sketch the stages of the site as Chimme did. He wasn't nearly as skilled as she was, but he tried to at least make sure his sketches were legible.

Being around so many different and diverse people, Syaoran learned a lot about each of them and their places of origin. Well, the people he talked to. Syaoran figured that if people didn't talk to him first then they didn't want to be bothered by him. Verne was always telling amazing stories of his home, adventures of danger and courage is how he described them. It really surprised Syaoran when one of the listeners told him it was all made up.

Chimme spoke to him of her country as well, not so much in a storytelling setting Verne had around a campfire after dark with alcohol and smoking, more just of the customs and traditions. Some legends which some were the scariest things he'd ever heard, but Chimme assured him he was completely safe. It didn't always help when he was thinking about them lying in his cot in the dark tent, just a burlap wall away from the vastness of the shadowed desert.

She told him these in between teaching him how to use various chemicals to imprint an image onto a paper. Although she liked to take pictures of him, she never let him actually touch her camera. Syaoran understood. It was a delicate piece of equipment, the last thing he wanted to do was accidently break it.

And of course he continued to learn from Fujitaka. In almost every minute he could spare, Fujitaka tried to find new and exciting things to teach to Syaoran. They were fascinating and he was grateful, although still a bit confused. There were a lot of other more useful things the man could've been doing with his time. Syaoran wasn't going to object though.

"Are you sure this okay?" Syaoran asked as he trailed behind Fujitaka up the steep hill, shifting his shoulders against the backpack he wore. "Shouldn't we be helping at the excavation?"

"It's all in good hands. I trust my team to handle matters, " Fujitaka said simply.

Syaoran nodded. The crew was made up of really good, hardworking people, and coming together they made a functional team. Everyone had their job, and working together they each made the excavation run smoothly. He decided that he trusted them too.

They'd been walking for hours now, hiking out into the desert for the day. Syaoran didn't know where they were going, but Fujitaka had them following close to the map, saying it was a surprise. Syaoran shifted the heavy pack again, wishing he could open it and eat the lunches they'd made early that morning. Fujitaka had told him it was only a little further, but he couldn't help the groaning his stomach made. If anything, eating them would make it lighter, although Syaoran refused to complain about that. Fujitaka carried the pack of their water, and it was far heavier than the food.

"We're almost there," Fujitaka said, gesturing up at a lumpy ledge near the the peak of the small mountain they were scaling. Syaoran wasn't sure what was so great about that spot, but he trusted Fujitaka too. They had to be something about it worth hiking out in the desert. He felt relieved all the same, though. By that time, a few weeks after coming to this desert, Syaoran was used to the hot sun beating down on him. Even so, the hiking combined with the heat had drops of sweat dripping down his neck from underneath his hat.

At last the made to just below the peak (it looked like they had a little more of a climb before they made it completely), and Fujitaka stopped with a smile on his face. "Shall we stop and eat then?"

Syaoran let out a long, tired breath. "Okay."

Syaoran found that he wasn't nearly as hungry as he was thirsty. He was glad Fujitaka had insisted on taking probably more water than they necessarily needed. It left enough for Syaoran to drink his fill, as well as splashing some of it on his face.

"Fujitaka-san?" Syaoran said after a couple moments of chewing.

He looked up from his own meal. "Yes, Syaoran-kun?"

Syaoran twisted his fingers together, confused as to why he felt nervous now. "It would make you happy if I called you father, right? Because you want to be my father?"

Fujitaka started. "I- yes, but I don't want you to decide anything just because it makes me happy."

"I haven't decided anything," Syaoran responded, feeling even more nervous. "But you do so much for me because you think it will make me happy. Chimme-san said to me that her father said a parent is a person who learns to be selfless. Is that what it means to be a father?"

"Uh, yes that's part of it," he replied slowly.

"And the other part is blood?"

Fujitaka frowned. "There are different types of familial relations. I adopted you, which means I took you in to take care of you and raise you. I'm your legal guardian. Family doesn't always have to be blood."

Syaoran blinked at him, trying to wrap his mind around the words. "Why did you?"

"Why did I what?" Fujitaka asked, his voice quiet and gentle.

"Why did you take me in? Surely it would've been more convenient if you hadn't."

There was another frown on Fujitaka's face now, sadder somehow. Syaoran frowned too. He didn't want to trouble the man, but he needed to know the answers to his questions.

"I wanted to make sure you were alright and taken care of. And I felt it was the right thing to do."

Syaoran looked down at his sandwich again. It wasn't really the answer he was looking for, (not that he knew what he was looking for). Feelings were still an abstract concept to him. They defied facts and logic, they were twisty and changing due to other's interpretation of them. He understood what it felt like to be hot or cold or hungry, but when he felt nervous or scared was very different. He knew there was no such thing as monsters in the dark corners outside of his tent at night, but that didn't mean he didn't fear them. And so, when Fujitaka told him he felt something was right or wrong, despite what logic said, it was confusing.

It was quiet for a few minutes while they finished their lunch, then Fujitaka stood up, a smile on his face. "Do you want to see something amazing?"

"Yes," Syaoran replied, standing up to follow Fujitaka.

They ended up climbing up a smaller rock wall to the peak. They were very high up now, the desert spread out for miles and miles in every direction he looked. It was bright and hot, the sun radiating heat on his head through his hat.

"Look over there," Fujitaka said, pointing. "Do you see it?"

Syaoran stepped forward, trying to see what Fujitaka was pointing at. In the far far distance, the waves of heat seemed to disperse enough for the strange structure to become visible. He couldn't really tell from the distance, but they looked like... wings jutting up from the sand. Not far away from it was what looked like a city.

"What is that?" Syaoran asked, suddenly feeling drawn to that place.

"That's the kingdom of Clow, and beside that is the ruins of Clow. They have quite a mystery surrounding them."

Syaoran took another step towards it. "Can we go there?"

Fujitaka nodded. "Actually, we'll be going there when we're done with the dig here."

"Really?" Syaoran said, suddenly excited.

He nodded again. "I'll arrange a meeting with the king there to make preparations to excavate there. We'll uncover those secrets and discover the history of that place, I'm sure of it."

Syaoran looked up and smiled. "I hope so."

Usually, Syaoran was pretty good at knowing where his feet were. But between looking out to the distant kingdom and standing so high up the mountain, his perception wasn't the best. With another step, Syaoran felt his foot scrape the edge. Before he could breathe, he began falling.

"Syaoran-kun!" he heard Fujitaka shout before a hand gripped his arm. His shoulder popped, sending pain through him. Syaoran cried out, sure he'd never felt such pain in his entire life.

His hat slipped of his head with the jostling and he watched it fall down the far far way down, landing harmlessly on the rocks below. At the moment it was hard to think through all the pain, but he knew that if Fujitaka let go of his hand now, he'd land on those rocks much harder than his hat had.

 _If Fujitaka wasn't here, I would be dead_ , Syaoran realized, looking up at the man through the tears in his eyes.

"Give me your other hand, I'll pull you up!" Fujitaka said, his voice strained and attempting to sound calm. He wasn't very successful, but Syaoran did as he said anyway. He reached up with his other hand, desperate to stop hanging from his injured arm. But at the angle he was hanging, his arm was too short, he was barely to brush Fujitaka's fingertips.

"I- I can't reach!" Syaoran shouted in fear.

"Hang on. Don't let go." Fujitaka shifted, holding tighter to Syaoran's wrist with his hand. Syaoran could feel his hand sliding slowly further down, making him even more scared. Then Fujitaka lifted Syaoran up a few inches. He tried to not scream, but it hurt so bad. Even so, he reached up his other hand, trying with all his might. When Fujitaka grasped his hand, the relief felt like a dam burst and he felt tears fall down his face, dripping off his chin.

Fujitaka pulled him up, and Syaoran's arm hurt almost worse. He yelped again, but kicked at the cliff face, trying to get back over the ledge. At last, Fujitaka was able to pull him back over the edge. Syaoran was shaking as Fujitaka held him in a hug. He tried to even his breath, but it didn't work. He just clutched onto Fujitaka's shirt, making sure he wouldn't fall again.

"Thank god, thank god…" Fujitaka repeated with his hand holding Syaoran's head to his shoulder, his voice just as shaky as Syaoran felt.

After a moment, Fujitaka eased away and pulled up Syaoran's loose sleeve to look at his shoulder. Syaoran sniffed as he wiped his face with his good hand, trying to not cry anymore. The joint of his shoulder was swollen, it turning purple as the blood pooled underneath his skin. Syaoran could see where the bone had popped out from the joint, making his shoulder look strangely bumpy. If it didn't hurt so much, Syaoran would've been much more interested in it's appearance.

"I'm so sorry, Syaoran-kun. I didn't want you to fall," Fujitaka apologized, his voice still trembling.

Syaoran didn't want to open his mouth, as he was grinding his teeth so hard, so he just nodded in response. He didn't blame Fujitaka for his arm, he was just glad he wasn't dead.

"We're miles away from our camp doctor, so I'll have to set it here. Is that okay, Syaoran-kun?" Fujitaka asked, his voice the most serious Syaoran had ever heard it.

The last thing Syaoran wanted was for Fujitaka or anyone to touch his shoulder, but he knew logically it would just be worse if he left it. So he nodded again.

"Okay," Fujitaka said. "I looks like a fairly simple dislocation." He touched his fingers lightly over the bone, and even that light touch caused pain to shoot through him.

"On three. One, two…"

Syaoran didn't hear Fujitaka say three. Fujitaka pulled on his shoulder firmly and Syaoran screamed as the bone popped back into place. But excruciating pain only lasted for a moment. After his arm was where it was supposed to be, it felt so much better. It still throbbed, but it was manageable now.

After it was over, Fujitaka tore off one of his long sleeves and tied it around Syaoran's neck and arm, suspending his arm against his chest.

"It's rudimentary, but it'll work for now. When we get back we'll have the doctor check it out. I hope the inside isn't too damaged…" Fujitaka let out a long breath, then lifted his hand to Syaoran's face, wiping at the tear on his cheek. "I'm so glad you're okay, Syaoran-kun."

Syaoran nodded once more, sniffling a little. He _was_ okay. He was alive, and that was thanks to Fujitaka. Syaoran would've fallen on those rocks so very far below, he would've died, all because he let himself get distracted." Syaoran felt himself shaking again, realizing how close to death he'd been.

"I- I'm sorry…"

"Why are you sorry?" Fujitaka asked softly.

He sniffed again, wiping at his face with the back of his free hand. "I almost fell because I wasn't paying attention. I didn't mean to trouble you."

He heard Fujitaka breathe out, then he leaned forward, gently wrapping the boy up in his arms. "You don't trouble me at all, Syaoran-kun. I'm happy to always be here to catch you when you need me to.

Syaoran swallowed dryly, feeling the truth in Fujitaka's words. He'd proved that he would, in more ways than just saving his life a few minutes ago. Syaoran felt inside him a warmth around his heart as he thought about how much Fujitaka cared for him. A warmth that had nothing to do with the heat of the desert sun. Closing his eyes, Syaoran leaned into Fujitaka, wrapping his uninjured arm around the man tightly.

Fujitaka stilled when Syaoran hugged him back, and Syaoran wondered for a moment if he'd done something wrong. Of all the hugs Fujitaka had given him, he'd never really returned any. Not because he didn't want the hugs, just that he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. This time though, Fujitaka just hugged him tighter, gingerly avoiding his shoulder. Was _this_ what a father was? Someone who cares for you and catches you when you fall? Syaoran had never known what it felt like to have a parent, but he assumed it was a little like how he about Fujitaka.

"Thank you," Syaoran murmured softly.

* * *

 **A/N** : It ended up being longer than I expected, but I couldn't figure out where to split it up... oh me know what you thought!

Also I will have the next chapter up next Sunday or Monday! Sneak peak: We'll meet Sakura! :D 33

To Kira-writer: Muchas gracias! Es usted muy agradable! (I don't speak Spanish, so thank goodness for google translate :) )


	3. The Princess of Clow

**A/N:** Hey! Sorry I took so long, I've been out of whack this past week. I'm excited about this chapter because SAKURA IS IN IT! I just love her, she's fabulous and adorable and perfect. A perfect angel. (Syaoran thinks this too) Okay, enjoy!

* * *

"Fujita- father," Syaoran got out. "Are you sure you want me to go with you when you speak with the king?" Syaoran asked, nervous as they made their way up the many steps to the palace.

He wanted to call Fujitaka father, he'd made that decision that yes, Fujitaka was his father. It had been over a year since he'd found him, and Syaoran felt that -it was still strange to him- but it was the right thing to do, as Fujitaka had said. It felt nice, although he couldn't help the stutter as he tried. He assumed that in the future it would be easier.

"You won't be in the way at all, Syaoran-kun, it that's what you're worried about," Fujitaka replied, not mentioning the familial address for the moment.

"I'm not- I…." Syaoran trailed off, taking a moment to string his words together. "What help could I contribute to such a meeting?"

Fujitaka chuckled softly. "Actually, the princess of this country is around your age. I was hoping perhaps you could make a friend with someone your own age."

Syaoran blinked, stopping mid-step. "The p-princess?"

With a smile, Fujitaka placed a hand on his back, guiding him forward up the stairs once more. "Don't worry, I hear she is very very kind."

Syaoran swallowed, more nervous at this than at the prospect of meeting the king for some reason. Fujitaka wanted him to be friends with the _princess_? Why? Surely she had a lot of friends who were more on her class level. He didn't even know what he would say to her; or if he could speak at all, his throat was so dry.

They arrived at the main palace and were led by a guard who chatted aimlessly with Fujitaka. It was so casual. All the kings and royalty Syaoran had ever read about were far more… kingly and formal than this place seemed to be. Everything was so peaceful. Syaoran doubted this guard had ever used that weapon strapped to his belt before.

They entered the throne room and Syaoran had expected the king to be sitting in a regal and ornate throne. It wasn't very ornate, it just carried the same simple elegance that the rest of the palace had. The king wasn't even sitting in it when they entered. He wore long, heavy robes as he stood by the open balcony across the room. When the guard announced them, the king looked up and smiled lightly.

"Welcome," he said kindly.

Fujitaka knelt, and Syaoran did the same. "Thank you for meeting with us, Clow-ou."

Clow smiled again, his glasses flashing in the light of the sun. He gestured for them to stand. "You've come a long way, I'm told. The both of you."

As he spoke those last words, he sent Syaoran a strange look. He was still smiling, but it made Syaoran feel like the was a cold draft on his neck. There was something in the king's eyes, as if he were seeing right through him. It made him feel uncomfortable.

"Yes, we have. As I told you in my letter, I am very interested in the ruins you have in this land. They seem like quite a mysterious landmark."

Clow looked back to Fujitaka. "They really are! I look forward to your reports of what you can find there. Yes, there are many secrets there waiting to be revealed, as all secrets must."

Fujitaka and Clow began discussing the details of schedule and how the excavation would go. Syaoran normally would have been very interested in it all, but he was so distracted by the king himself. Everything Clow said seemed to hold more than simply his spoken words, not even just double meanings. It was more like infinite meanings. The impression was hard to describe. Syaoran couldn't really think of the words for the man.

"Father!" A young voice interrupted, along with the patter of running feet.

Clow turned to the young girl with a smile. "Sakura-hime?"

"I'm sorry! You have a guest?" she apologized when she realized that they were there.

Clow smiled again. "It's quite alright."

Fujitaka stepped forward, dipping his head in a bow to the princess. Syaoran looked up and did the same.

"Hello, your highness," Fujitaka greeted. "My name is Fujitaka, I'll be overseeing the excavation of this country's ruins."

He touched a hand to Syaoran's shoulder. "And please allow me to introduce my son, Syaoran-kun."

The princess smiled and nodded.

"Excuse me for a moment, please," Clow said as he led his daughter aside, kneeling down to speak softly with her.

Syaoran looked up to Fujitaka. "That's the princess?" he asked.

Fujitaka nodded. "She looks nice, doesn't she?"

The boy looked back to her, noticing that she was glancing at him while she spoke with her father. Syaoran couldn't help it as his face heated up. She did look nice, and really pretty too. Her hair was a lighter brown with some red in it. She was paler than he would have figured a princess of a desert kingdom would be. Maybe she spent a lot of time indoors. When she noticed him looking at her, she smiled brightly, and Syaoran felt his heartbeat stutter, which was strange. He lifted his hand to the vein in his neck, trying to figure out why his pulse had quickened when she looked at him.

With a soft laugh, Fujitaka patted his hair. Syaoran didn't understand why he was laughing. What if there was something medically wrong with him? But he didn't get the chance to ask. The king walked back over to them, the princess by his side.

She walked forward, excitement on her face. "My name's Sakura. Your name is Syaoran-kun, yes?"

Syaoran blinked. "Uh- yes..."

Sakura giggled, smiling brightly. "Would you like to play with me, Syaoran-kun?"

"Uh…" Syaoran blushed again, then looked up to Fujitaka. For help or for permission, he wasn't sure which he wanted more.

Fujitaka patted Syaoran's back again, prompting him forward. "I'll come and get you when it's time to go home."

Syaoran swallowed, looking back to the princess. "O-okay.."

With another smile, Sakura grabbed him by the hand and led him off out of the throne room. He looked back to see Fujitaka smile lightly, then walk away to further discuss the matter of the ruins with the king.

"Come on, I'll show you my favorite part of the garden! You'll love it!" Princess Sakura said excitedly, pulling him down the halls of the palace.

Through the columns of pillars, they entered a large garden which was full of green plants and fragrant flowers. Syaoran wasn't entirely sure how it was possible to create such an environment for such lush plant life to grow in a desert climate, but they succeeded. Maybe it had something to do with the level of moisture in the air. It felt heavy with it, making his skin feel damp. They must have had some sort of system pumping the moisture into the air to make it more sustaining than the dry air of the desert. It was beautiful and ingenious.

The entire space was filled with green, more green that he'd seen in the entire existence he knew. The only thing he'd seen similar to this was the pictures in some of Fujitaka's books.

"Wow…" he couldn't help but mutter, totally in awe of the jungle he'd been led into.

Sakura looked back, smiling brightly. "I told you you'd love it! Now we're almost there."

She led him through the narrow paths between the growth. On either side of them was shelves holding up pots full of different sorts of plants and flowers.

"Here we are!" Sakura said triumphantly, and Syaoran couldn't help but let his jaw drop.

There were so many colors of every kind of flower (he assumed they were all there.) In the little corner was a small fountain made to look like a waterfall, crashing against the rocks. It spilled out, constructed to bring water to the plants surrounding it, so it was a tool rather than just a decoration.

From the side was a balcony looking over the kingdom, framed with columns. It looked like an entrance to the garden, which means Sakura had pulled him through the entire garden when she could've brought him to the closest door. He didn't mind, the garden was amazing.

Sakura hadn't let go of his hand, and was now bouncing up and down in excitement, jarring him with the movement. "What do you think, Syaoran-kun?"

He looked at her strangely. "Why have you shown me this place, your highness?"

Her head tilted to the side, confusion in her features. "Because I think it's pretty, and I wanted to show it to my new friend Syaoran-kun."

Syaoran couldn't help but stare at that. _Friend_? They'd only met a couple minutes ago, how could they already be friends? She was a princess and he was the adopted son of an archeologist. The class difference was quite large. Although he found himself not minding the label too much. He didn't really have any friends, and wasn't entirely sure what it meant to be someone else's. He had a father, and he had mentors, but not really friends. And earlier Fujitaka had said it would be good for him to have friends his own age. Syaoran couldn't tell what difference age made, but he didn't try to argue.

Looking back to Sakura, he couldn't deny the immense warmth which filled him at her words, and her smile. Is this what it feels like to be a friend? He couldn't tell, feelings were hard to understand sometimes. They were abstract, not concrete like facts he could read in a book. Emotions couldn't really be read.

"Sakura-hime," he said after a moment. "Thank you… for showing me this place. It is very beautiful."

Sakura nearly squealed, twirling around in delight. "It is, isn't it?!"

"Uh… yes, your highness," Syaoran replied, confused at the second question.

Sakura laughed, smiling at him once more. "I hope that you and your father stay for a while, and that I can spend more time with Syaoran-kun, if that's alright?"

The warmth blossomed within him once more and his hand moved to grasp his shirt, his fist over his heart. She was so kind to someone she hadn't even known an hour. "I-it's alright."

With another blinding smile, she took his hand once more and led him to a small patch of grass and clover beside the columns. His face was hot again as she sat down, gesturing for him to do the same. Then she started picking at the little green leaf clusters and somehow knotting them together. Syaoran watched her while she weaved the stems together.

"Wha-what are you doing, your highness?" Syaoran asked after a moment of watching her hands tie.

Sakura looked up. "I'm making a flower crown! Well, not _flower_ , since there aren't any clover flowers right now. But the clovers themselves work fine too. Do you want to learn how?"

Syaoran looked at her hands, then back to her smiling face and nodded.

"Okay, what you do is you carefully tie the stem in a knot around the head of each clover. When it's big enough to fit on your head, then you can tie the ends together," Sakura explained, showing him with her own crown as he picked a few clovers from the ground.

He tried pulling the stem into a knot as she showed him, although his snapped while hers curved.

"You'll get the hang of it," she encourage.

They spent a while working on the crowns, and Syaoran hadn't realized how much it took to just get two tied together, but he was determined to do his best. The princess had taught him, he would not let her down. Eventually he was able to fold the stem without it breaking, but by that time, Sakura's crown was almost done. Hers looked full and nice while his was quite flat and boring looking. She assured him it was completely fine, but he still worked hard to make it as good as hers.

"Oi, kaiju," someone said from above them. "Who's the kid?"

Syaoran lifted his head to the new person, people actually. There was a boy with dark hair and one with silver. They were standing by the pillars, the dark haired one eyeing Syaoran. Syaoran couldn't fathom what he'd done to receive such a nasty glare.

Sakura stood up, anger in her face. "I'm not a kaiju!"

The brown haired boy looked at her again, smirking. "That's just what a kaiju would say."

Sakura's cheek puffed as she stomped forward and attempted to kick at the boy's leg, which he dodged.

"That's probably enough now, majesties," the silver haired boy stepped in, a light smile on his face.

Sakura backed up to stand beside Syaoran again. "Syaoran-kun, this is my brother, Prince Touya. And this is Yukito-san, he's preparing to become a high priest."

Syaoran bowed to the both of them. "I'm Syaoran."

Yukito bowed his head in response while Touya simply frowned at him. "What's he doing here, though?" Touya asked with what seemed to be annoyance in his tone. The prince's attitude towards him completely confused him. Syaoran had paid the proper respects, introduced himself. He hadn't done anything impolite or of any other sort than just _being there_. He didn't think just being the same room as someone could warrant such a response.

Sakura gestured to him, seemingly not seeing Touya's glare, or simply ignoring it. "Syaoran-kun's father is the chief archeologist who's going to investigate the ruins outside of the kingdom. Fujitaka-san is here talking with father right now."

Touya sniffed, but Yukito spoke over that. "That should be interesting. Those ruins are quite the mystery, so I'm sure there will be many things to discover there."

Syaoran nodded. "There will be a lot of preparation before any digging can be done, though."

"So that means you'll stay longer?" Sakura asked, turning to him with excitement on his face.

Syaoran felt himself blush again, taking a step backwards. "Uh.. probably? I haven't heard any concrete details from my father yet."

Sakura jumped up, squealing happily. "i'm so glad! I'm glad that Syaoran-kun can stay and be my friend! C'mon, let's finish our crowns."

It wasn't long after that that Fujitaka came to get him. Sakura placed the crown she'd made on his head and told him she hoped she'd see him soon. Which made him blush. But he returned the sentiment, because he truly wanted to see her again as well, sooner than later. There was just something about her that was… more than kind, it was just a general pleasure being able to spend time with her. His heart still raced when she smiled at him or took his hand, but it didn't feel like a bad thing.

"What did the king say?" Syaoran asked, eager to know what the dig would be like.

Fujitaka smiled down to him. "He said that we could take as much time as we want on this project, that the historical prospect of it is important to him and to this country. We will have to make as much preparation as we can, because working in the desert is dangerous. It will probably be at least a few years before we're able to actually start digging. Are you okay with that?"

Syaoran smiled at that. "Yes. This country is nice, and... " He looked down again, heat rising to his face once more. "The princess said she would be happy if I could stay longer."

"So how was it with the princess?" Fujitaka asked as they walked home.

Syaoran gently touched the leafy crown as he held it in his hands. "She taught me to make a crown made of clover."

"Did you make that one?"

He shook his head. "This is the one the princess made. I left mine with her."

Fujitaka patted his head as they continued to walk through the streets.

Syaoran closed his eyes, remembering Sakura's face as she beamed at him. It was a smile unlike any he'd ever seen. So bright and beautiful and kind.

"The princess, she's so warm, isn't she?" Syaoran said, more to himself than to Fujitaka.

"Yes," Fujitaka answered. "Sometimes a kind heart can hold more warmth than the sun."

Syaoran looked up at him, unsure how that could be possible. The sun was a burning gaseous mass, giving warmth to the entire galaxy. How could one person's heart carry more heat than that? But as Syaoran remembered what it felt like to be with Sakura, he couldn't help but see the truth in Fujitaka's words. He held a little tighter to the crown and followed Fujitaka through the streets.

* * *

A few months had passed since Fujitaka had brought his team to the kingdom of Clow. It wasn't much different from the desert they had been in before, except the people there were unusually kind. The princess Sakura was a prime example of this, but it wasn't just her. The citizens themselves were so happy and content, living together peacefully. The market Syaoran had been found in had been filled with people who frowned and moaned complaints, fully ignoring the quiet, wounded boy at the side of the road. The people of Clow seemed much kinder.

Syaoran stood beside Fujitaka as they waited in line to pay for some produce at the market. Looking around, he took in the sight of the brighter market of Clow. Not everyone was smiling, but there was an indescribable air of peace to it. It was exciting. Looking around though, he saw a man sitting beside a wall. His shoes looked worn and his clothes old. In his hand was a warm-looking pastry, probably from the bakery not far from where he sat.

"Father?" Syaoran asked up to Fujitaka.

"Yes?"

Syaoran pointed to the man, then looked up. "Is he like me?"

Fujitaka looked at the man for a moment, then patted Syaoran's head. "We can't know what someone is like just by looking at them."

"Right," Syaoran replied, glancing at the man with an odd feeling in his stomach. Sympathy and… envy. It was a strange thing to feel. Maybe because he was being taken care of while he sat there. People smiled and talked to him as they walked by, handing him stray coins. Had it been because Syaoran was a child that people didn't want to help him? He didn't know, but he found himself walking over to the man.

"Syaoran-kun?" Fujitaka said questioningly, but didn't stop him.

As Syaoran approached, the man looked up with a kind smile on his wrinkled face.

"Hello," he said.

Syaoran said nothing, just stared at the man, trying to figure out this confusion he had.

"Can I help you?"

Syaoran blinked. "Why do you want to help me?"

The man laughed, which just confused Syaoran more. He tilted his head to the side. "Is it because people help you?"

The man looked up at him with a deep expression. "Maybe, I guess. I can't walk very easily, so there are many people I know here who go out of their way to help me. Are your parents here, little one?"

Syaoran nodded, then pointed over to Fujitaka, who was watching from where he stood in line. "My father. He adopted me after he found me alone on the street."

Syaoran wasn't sure why he was telling this man all of this. He felt a strange sort of solidarity with him. As he spoke, the man's face grew more solemn.

"That must've been hard, being alone like that."

"Are you alone?" Syaoran asked.

At that, the man smiled with sadness in his eyes. "Not at your age, I wasn't."

"But you're alone now?"

He laughed again. "My, aren't you a curious one!"

Syaoran looked down. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Asking questions is how we learn and grow, and you still got lots of both of those to do."

He knew that. He still was trying to learn all of the language people used. There was so much he didn't know, only having a year or so of memories. The books Fujitaka had were barely a fraction of the knowledge of the world. Syaoran wished he could learn it all, although he knew that was probably impossible.

Syaoran reached into his pocket and pulled out the couple of coins Fujitaka had given him to buy something he liked at the market. He bowed his head and held out the coins to the man.

"You don't need to give me this," the man said.

Syaoran shook his head. "I want to help, because you're alone, and when I was alone no one but Fujitaka-san helped me. I want to help you."

The man hesitated for a moment, then took the coins. As Syaoran looked at him, he could see the man's eyes glistening.

"T-thank you, child."

Syaoran bowed once more, then ran back to Fujitaka.

Fujitaka didn't say anything, just patted Syaoran's head as they moved off to finish their shopping.

* * *

 **A/** **N** : Sneak peak - the next chapter will be called 'A Mother' and will have lots of Sakura in it, because I missed her and was so glad to have her back for this chapter! (I miss Fai and Kurogane and Mokona too.. maybe I'll be able to find a place to have them, because they're so great) Reviews would be so great, thank you thank you!


	4. A Mother

**A/N** : I'm so sorry this is so late posting! I went camping and then got super sidetracked and this got put on the back burner. Hope you like this chapter!

* * *

It turned out they did stay in Clow for quite a while. During the preparations for the excavation, Fujitaka figured that it would probably take years to finish such a project. They'd been staying in the inn, but since it would take longer than expected, Fujitaka told Syaoran that they would find a more permanent place to live.

The house they bought was small, but about the same as the other houses around it. Sometimes Syaoran worried that he would accidently walk into someone else's home, mistaking it for his own. It never happened, but sometimes the thought did come into his mind.

Sakura had been very excited when he'd told her that he and Fujitaka were moving into a house and out of the inn. She'd grabbed his hands and spun him around gleefully, hurraying that he would stay longer. The whole ordeal made his face flush, but he was glad to be able to spend more time with the princess.

It was hot outside, and not much better inside the house as they unpacked their boxes. Syaoran wiped sweat from his forehead after setting a box down on his bed in the side of the front room. There wasn't much room in the house, only one other room besides the bathroom. Fujitaka had suggested hanging up curtains or adjusting some bookshelves to differentiate areas into different 'rooms'. Syaoran was fine with it. All he'd known for living quarters was a crowded tent and a tiny hotel room.

Absentmindedly, he began pulling out the contents of the box to figure out where they would go. There were books, rolled up maps, random knick knacks and artifacts. It took awhile, as Syaoran got distracted examining them. Halfway through the box, his hand grasped a picture frame. He blinked, looking at the woman behind the glass. He'd never seen her before, (and he'd never seen Fujitaka have any photographs in picture frames.) She had dark hair curling down past her shoulders, green eyes similar to Sakura's, and a kind smile. Syaoran touched the glass, wondering who she was.

"When you're done with that box, we should go to the market for lunch, what do you think?" Fujitaka said, walking up behind Syaoran carrying a stack of books.

Syaoran looked at him and held up the photograph. Fujitaka started at it, then set down the books on the table.

"Who is she?" Syaoran asked, as it was obvious Fujitaka knew her.

Fujitaka smiled at him, then reached out a took the frame from Syaoran's hand. "This is my wife, Nadeshiko. I thought this picture got lost in storage…"

Syaoran furrowed his brow. _Fujitaka's wife?_ He wasn't married, or Syaoran would've met her. Where was she and why hadn't Fujitaka ever mentioned her before.

"Where did she go?" He was aware this could be a painful question, but he wanted to know.

With another smile, Fujitaka looked up from the frame. "She died a few years ago. I'm glad you found this picture of her. We can put it on the table."

His smile was confusing. Shouldn't you be sad when someone you love dies? Smiles were for happiness, but Syaoran wasn't sure of what answer he wanted to ask for, so he kept quiet about that. "Don't you have any other pictures of her?" he asked instead.

Fujitaka nodded, then pulled out his wallet where there was a small photograph of Nadeshiko. It was placed beside the photograph Chimme had taken of Syaoran. The one of Nadeshiko looked older, the edges worn.

"I was worried that the framed picture would get lost or broken so I put it in storage with my other belongings. It's been awhile since I've had a more permanent place to live."

Fujitaka touched the glass once more, then set it down on the table and turned to the other room. "Finish up and we'll go get something to eat, okay?"

"Okay," Syaoran said, glancing at the photograph once more before finishing up clearing the box.

* * *

Syaoran couldn't help but look at the photograph going about his day. Her smile was so soft and happy, it was almost haunting to think she wasn't alive anymore. She was like a ghost, smiling at him from behind some veil. It made him feel scared and amazed at the same time.

 _Why didn't he tell me about her before?_ Syaoran couldn't but think, feeling a pit in his stomach. What else did he not know about his father? _Would he have told me if I hadn't found that photograph?_

A knock at the door broke him out of his thoughts and he turned to answer it. "Coming," he said to whoever it was.

The door opened to the little princess, a cloak wrapped around her. When he opened it, she broke into a huge smile and hugged him tight.

"Hi, Syaoran-kun!" she said excitedly.

"S-Sakura-hime!" he blinked, startled. She had a made it a habit of hugging him like this when they hadn't seen each other for a few days.

He pulled at her arms until she let go, blushing brightly. "Would you like to come in?" he asked, trying to salvage some proprietary to the encounter.

"Okay, and I brought you something, Syaoran-kun."

"You did?" Syaoran asked, noticing for the first time the basket she'd set down. She held it higher and lifted the cloth inside to show him some warm looking pastries.

"I didn't make them, but I kept the cook company while he made them. I thought you and Fujitaka-san would like to have a house-warming gift."

Syaoran accepted the basket as she handed it to him. "Thank you, princess. Would you like some tea?"

"Sure!" Sakura said happily, following him into the house. "It looks like you're close to being unpacked now."

"We didn't have any work today, so dad and I decided to try to get the house orderly," Syaoran replied. "Y-you can sit on that bed. Sorry, we don't really have much furniture yet."

"It's fine," Sakura, sitting on the edge of his bed.

He moved around the corner kitchen, filling a kettle with water from the pump in the sink. Then he turned on the stove, placing the kettle on the burner to boil. As he'd worked, Sakura had picked up the picture frame of Nadeshiko. When he sat down next to her, she looked up. "Is this your mother?"

Syaoran shook his head. "That's Nadeshiko-san, my dad's wife who died a few years ago. I never met her."

Sakura looked back to the picture. "She's so beautiful. She was probably very kind, do you think?"

"Yes, I think she was," Syaoran said softly, leaning over to look at the photo again. Nadeshiko hadn't moved, of course, but somehow as he looked at her with Sakura, her smile seemed brighter.

"She seems familiar somehow, although I'm sure I've never met her," Sakura muttered quietly.

"My dad has been to Clow country before, maybe you saw her when they had come before," Syaoran said, but Sakura shook her head.

"It's not like that. I don't know."

It was strange, Syaoran couldn't think of a logical reason. Maybe she looked similar to someone Sakura had met before? He didn't know.

"Do you wish you had met her?" Sakura asked after a moment.

"Eh?" Syaoran said in confusion. He wasn't sure why that was relevant. "She died long before dad found me."

"But I mean Fujitaka-san is your father, which means Nadeshiko-san is the closest person you have to a mother, right?"

Syaoran swallowed dryly. "Uh… I- I suppose. I don't know." He looked back to the picture, to Nadeshiko's smiling face. It was like she was looking up at him and trying to say something, but he couldn't hear what she wanted to say beyond the grave. It was probably his imagination.

He looked back to Sakura and nodded. "I do wish I had met her."

Gently, Sakura placed the picture frame back on the table, then wrapped her arms around him in a hug. Syaoran blinked. "Uh.. Sakura-hime?"

She pulled back with a smile then moved towards the door. "Actually I have to get going, but I'll see you later, okay Syaoran-kun?"

"O-of course," Syaoran replied as she opened the door.

She stopped for a moment, her back to him, then she turned and smiled brightly. "I'm sure Nadeshiko-san wishes she'd met you too."

With that, Sakura left, leaving Syaoran alone in the house.

* * *

Later in the evening, Syaoran sat with Fujitaka, going over some books full of different places in the world. As Fujitaka had told him earlier, the preparation would take quite a while before they could start digging at the ruins, so he was looking into other digs and destinations his fellow archaeologists had informed him of. Syaoran hoped they could go to some of the places, they looked so different and interesting.

As they read through the books, Syaoran couldn't help but think of his conversation with Sakura before, and that picture frame which rested on the table beside his bed.

"Um.. father?"

Fujitaka looked up. "Yes?"

"What was your wife, Nadeshiko-san, like?" Syaoran asked, unsure if he really wanted to intrude and ask such a question.

But Fujitaka didn't look affronted or offended. He just smiled that same smile he had when they'd found the picture. "She was one of the kindest people I had ever met. Very forgiving and compassionate, especially considering how much time my career took. Sometimes it was surprising how understanding she could be.

"She was quite eccentric, too. You wouldn't know from just her picture. I actually met her by catching her fall as she fell out of a tree she had climbed. Nadeshiko-san… she spent much of her time trying to make our lives 'more interesting' as she would say. We went on some wonderful adventures, she and I."

Syaoran listened quietly and intently.

Fujitaka's faced saddened for a moment as he got lost in his memories. Then he looked up and smiled again at Syaoran. "Why do want to know all of this, Syaoran-kun?"

Syaoran flushed, feeling flustered suddenly. "I don't know… she was very important to you and I know that I'll never meet her… the princess- she said that since Nadeshiko-san was your wife, then she must be the closest person I have to a mother-"

He stopped himself, not sure why he suddenly spoke so much of this. He glanced up at Fujitaka, who was smiling widely. He came forward and placed his hand on Syaoran head, lightly ruffling his hair.

His face sobered a bit, leaning down to look Syaoran in the face. "Syaoran-kun, do you wish you remembered your birth parents?"

Syaoran looked up at the question, then bit his lip. He wished he knew the reason why he'd been abandoned in the street. What'd he'd done to be thrown away. Why he couldn't remember… But his past was unreachable, there was no point in wishing for something that didn't exist anymore in his mind. Fujitaka was his father, and Syaoran would never wish for otherwise. Slowly, he shook his head.

"I don't. You're my father, Fujitaka-san. But… I don't know what it means to have a mother, and when Sakura-hime said that…"

Fujitaka didn't say anything, just waited as Syaoran articulated his thoughts.

"I wonder what she would've thought of me…" Syaoran said finally.

With swift movements, Fujitaka knelt down and wrapped Syaoran up in his arms. "I'm sure Nadeshiko-san would have loved you, just like I love you."

Syaoran didn't know what to do with this sort of situation, so he just hugged Fujitaka back.

* * *

Over the next few days, Syaoran read as much as he could about mothers, from stories and history books. They were supposed to be the nurturers of their children, at least that was what the world consensus of them was. He hadn't really met that many mothers, although he didn't know very many women in general. He knew Chimme, but she didn't have any children. Of course, he knew Sakura, but she was only eight. And her mother had passed away before Sakura had even known her.

Syaoran found himself watching the people in the market closely, mothers with their children. When the small ones cried, their mother would pick them up and comfort them. Or they'd reprimand them when they misbehaved. It was an interesting study, seeing how different each parent handled each situation.

Over all, he could see that mother's cared for their children deeply. They sacrificed their time and energy for kids who didn't even seem to notice the strain it caused them. Syaoran found himself wondering again what kind of mother Nadeshiko would have been.

He thought about this a lot, and on this night it kept him awake. He stared at the ceiling as he lay in his bed, thinking about parents, what it meant to be one, and what it meant to have one.

He reached over and grabbed the frame, looking again at her smiling face in the dim light of the dark house.

Although he knew she couldn't hear him, and that she had passed on long ago, he spoke anyway. "Hello, Nadeshiko-san," he said quietly. "Um… my name is Syaoran. I don't know what my name was before Fujitaka-san found me."

Syaoran stopped, looking to the door to where Fujitaka slept, making sure he couldn't be heard. How could he explain talking to a dead person like this?

He looked back to Nadeshiko. "Fujitaka-san is my father now, and I very glad about that. He took me in and cares for me with no benefit to himself. I'm not sure I've ever met anyone so selfless. I'm very glad to have met him. Although I wish I could've met you, Nadeshiko-san. He tells me you were very kind, and Fujitaka-san has never lied to me. Not that I think you weren't kind, it's just that I know almost nothing about you."

With a sigh, Syaoran placed the picture down on the bed. This was pointless. There was no information he could get by talking to a picture frame. He sighed, laying down again.

"I just want to know if you wanted to be a mother. And… if you would've been alright with being mine."

Syaoran sighed in resignation, turning on his side to fall asleep.

* * *

"Syaoran-kun! C'mon c'mon!" Sakura said with energy.

"Where are we going, your highness?" Syaoran asked with confusion. He doubted she'd answer though. She did this all the time, drag him to wonderful places, making sure it was a surprise. It was nice how much she wanted to share the beauty of her world with him.

"You'll see! Don't worry, we're almost there."

They were outside of the town, just at the edges of the desert. This was one of the times when she ventured far enough that the guard and her brother would definitely not want her to go. Hence her climbing over the palace wall to spend time with him. It was a little bit flattering, but mostly stressful.

"You've been to this place before, princess?"

"Yup!" Sakura replied.

Syaoran felt himself blanche. "Meaning you came way out here on your own?"

Sakura turned to smile brightly at him. "Yup!" she repeated, not an ounce of shame in her.

"Sa-Sakura-hime, you could've been hurt coming out here by yourself!"

It wasn't even just flat desert in this place she'd brought him to. The terrain was jagged with hills and choppy cliffs. A wrong step could throw you down hard, and although there probably weren't any high enough to be fatal, a fall would still break bones.

"But I didn't get hurt! And now I'm not by myself because I'm with you, Syaoran-kun!"

Syaoran sighed. "It's- that's not what I meant…"

She waved off his concern with another smile. "You don't have to worry so much, Syaoran-kun. It's alright."

He let it go, figuring that there really wasn't any point in arguing with her. Eventually she stopped and sat herself down in the dust, hanging her legs over the low ledge of a rock face.

"So what did you want to show me?" Syaoran asked, looking around.

"Oh! Nothing, I just wanted to go explore a bit, just us."

Syaoran couldn't help the blush on his face as he sat next to her. "Oh okay…"

Slowly, Sakura's smile faded, her face growing a bit more serious. Syaoran leaned forward to look at her. She was always cheerful… "What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "Nothing at all, but there is something I wanted to tell you, Syaoran-kun."

"What is it?" he blinked in confusion.

The princess fidgeted, like she wasn't sure how to say the words on her mind. She opened and closed her mouth a few times before actually turning to him.

"This will sound strange, and I'm not sure how to explain it so that it makes sense."

Syaoran's head tilted to the side. "Tell me."

Sighing, her face became resolute. "I can speak to those who have passed away, but not just that. Any voice that needs to be heard will come and find me. My father says it's because my heart wants to listen and help them."

He blinked again, unsure what to make of what she said. It sounded like something out of a story, not something that made any scientific sense. Although Fujitaka had told him that there was magic in the world… And Syaoran believed that Sakura wasn't lying to him. She'd never said an untrue thing to him before. Which meant it must be true.

"You don't believe me?" Sakura asked after a few moments of him not replying.

"No, I do!" he insisted. "I know you wouldn't lie, Sakura-hime."

She smiled, then grasped his hand happily. His face turned red, but he didn't pull his hand away.

"Was that what you wanted to tell me, princess?"

"It's part of it," Sakura said, still holding his hand. "The other part is… I spoke with the woman in the photograph, Nadeshiko-san."

Syaoran stilled, feeling startled. _How is that even possible?_ But that wasn't an important question right then.

"What- I- um… what did she, uh… say?" he got out, stuttering in his sudden nervousness.

"She had a message for you, actually."

His nervousness only increased. He swallowed at his dry throat, but kept quiet, waiting for Sakura to continue.

Sakura squeezed lightly at his hand, then took a breath. "She told me to tell you, 'Of course I'm alright with it. I would love to, and I'm glad Fujitaka has taken you in as a son.' She didn't tell me what that first part means, but she said you would know."

For a moment, Syaoran wasn't sure if he was able to breath. It should've been impossible, but he felt the truth of Sakura's words. It was hard to explain how, he just knew. Nadeshiko had actually spoken to her, given her the message for him just so that he could have that simple message. It was so kind.

Without a word, he leaned forward and wrapped his arms around her. He felt her start, and he was about to let go of her, fearing he'd overstepped a line. She'd always been the one to initiate their embraces… But in response, Sakura threw her own arms around him, hugging him heartily.

"Thank you, Sakura-hime."

Sakura giggled in response, hugging him tighter. It was almost too tight; his breathing slightly strained. But it was a good feeling.

* * *

"I'm home," Syaoran called as he opened the door to his home.

Fujitaka peeked around the stacks of boxes and shelves, a mixing spoon in his hands. "Welcome back! Did you have fun with the princess?"

Syaoran nodded, sitting at the table.

"What did you two do today?" Fujitaka asked lightheartedly.

Syaoran smiled down at the table. "We explored the outside of the city."'

"You made sure to be safe, right?"

"Yes," Syaoran replied. "I would never risk the princess' safety."

Fujitaka smiled down at him, although his brow was creased. "Or your own, I hope."

He nodded again, not wanting to worry his father. Really, there was nothing he could do to stop the princess if she set her mind on something she wanted. The best he could do was to protect her from hurting herself in these endeavors.

"Would you set the table, please? This is almost ready to eat," Fujitaka asked.

"Okay," Syaoran replied, walking over to retrieve the dishes and utensils, setting the table for two places. He couldn't stop looking at the picture of the smiling woman. She'd spoken to him, actually spoken to him from beyond the grave. _She would've been happy to be my mother_ , Syaoran though, a smile finding it's way onto his face.

Syaoran glanced at the man who'd become his father, biting his lip nervously. He wanted to tell Fujitaka what Sakura had said. What _Nadeshiko_ had said. _What if he doesn't believe me?_ Syaoran thought mournfully. _What if he thinks I'm making light of his loss_?

He frowned at the thought, sitting down in one of the chairs at the table as Fujitaka set their meal on the table. Fujitaka sat down across from him, placing his hands together, and Syaoran did the same.

"Itadakimasu," they said together before beginning to eat.

Syaoran bit into a roll halfheartedly, not really having an appetite for much else. _I don't want Fujitaka to be upset with me_ , he thought firmly. _Or for him to be sad._

"What's wrong, Syaoran-kun?" Fujitaka asked, interrupting Syaoran's thoughts.

He looked up to Fujitaka's concerned face, surprised that the man could tell. Although he could always tell. _I must not hide it that well._

"Did something happen with the princess?" he pressed when Syaoran didn't reply.

Syaoran shrugged. "Sort of…"

Fujitaka set his chopsticks down. "Can you tell me?"

The boy frowned, but he didn't want to lie to his father. "You'll believe me, right?"

Fujitaka smiled. "Of course I will."

"It's strange…" Syaoran started. "Sakura-hime told me that she has a gift… that she can speak with those that have passed on, because her heart wants to listen…"

"Really?" Fujitaka asked, looking more intrigued than skeptical.

Syaoran nodded. "She said she spoke with your wife, Nadeshiko-san…"

This time, Fujitaka said nothing, but his surprised silence wasn't very encouraging. Syaoran continued nonetheless. "She said… Sakura-hime said that she said that…"

He trailed off, glancing nervously at Fujitaka. He sat, his face openly stunned and tears in his eyes. Syaoran frowned, looking down as he clenched his hands in the fabric of his pants. _I made him sad. I shouldn't have said anything._

"What did she say?" Fujitaka asked, his voice full of an emotion Syaoran couldn't place. "Please tell me."

Syaoran looked up. "She said 'Of course I'm alright with it. I would love to, and I'm glad Fujitaka has taken you in.' She was answering a question I had asked her to her photograph…"

Fujitaka walked around the table to kneel in front of him. There were streaks of tears down his face.

"Father, you're crying?" Syaoran started, touching the moisture with his small fingers.

Fujitaka smiled, clasping Syaoran's fingers in his much larger hand. "Don't mind that. What did you ask her?"

For some reason, the sight of that smile made Syaoran's heart tremble within him, warmth filling and easing his nerves a bit. He swallowed, glancing at the frame once more. "If she would've been alright with being my mother…"

He looked back to Fujitaka, who was smiling even brighter than before. Without a word, he wrapped his arms around Syaoran, holding tightly to him.

"I'm sure she loves you just as much as I do, Syaoran-kun," Fujitaka said quietly.

Syaoran felt his own face moisten as he relaxed into the embrace, letting his head rest on Fujitaka's shoulder.

"I love you too, father."

 _Both you and my mother_.

* * *

 **A/N** : I kinda wonder what it would've been like if Syaoran had had Nadeshiko as a mother along with Fujitaka as a father... *shrug*

I would love to hear your thoughts! Reviews are so super appreciated 3

(Hopefully next chapter won't take nearly as long...)


	5. Left Behind

**A/N** : YO! It's been a while, sorry 'bout that. I hope this chapter makes up for it, I really liked writing it. So far, I think it might be my favorite.

Also a HUGE thank you to all of you who've reviewed and favorited and followed, it means so much to me!

* * *

It had been five years since Fujitaka had picked Syaoran up off the streets. Syaoran looked back at the years with fondness, all the adventures they'd gone on, his friendship with Sakura, having Fujitaka as his father. Syaoran was twelve now, and was taller than Sakura, he was happy to notice. He still had a ways to go before he passed the now king, Touya. Who still hated his guts. Syaoran never did understand why, but it didn't matter. Sakura didn't hate him, and he was happy with that.

Syaoran and Fujitaka had returned from their latest adventure just that morning, their belongings and findings cluttering up the small space. Sakura was there, sitting on his bed (as they'd never bought a couch), listening excitedly as Syaoran told her of the place they'd returned from. How the temples they'd explored were probably built over a thousand years ago, and were still in pretty good shape. The engravings on the wall still legible.

"We heard rumours that there were booby traps to keep people out, but none of us or the other groups came across anything like that," Syaoran continued.

"I'm glad for that. I wouldn't want you or anyone to be hurt while on your adventures," Sakura replied, slight worry in her face.

"It was only part of the local legend. With that sort of history at your door, the people's stories can take on a new life in superstitions. It was perfectly safe."

It was little bit of a lie. No archeological dig was completely safe. Especially when is was in the middle of a dense jungle and numerous predators and many other natural hazards, but there was no need to worry Sakura after the fact.

Fujitaka came up behind him, holding a tray of tea, which he placed on the table beside the princess. "Here you go," he said with a light smile.

"Thank you very much!" Sakura said happily as he poured her a cup.

Syaoran accepted his own cup. "Thank you."

"No problem," Fujitaka said. His smile was different somehow, though. Strained almost, and he moved as though he was sore. Absentmindedly, he rubbed at his arm.

Syaoran's brow creased. "Are you alright, Dad?" he asked.

Fujitaka blinked, then smiled again. "I'm fine, I'm just a little sore from our trip.

"When you're finished with your tea, would you mind picking up some groceries at the market, Syaoran-kun? I'm afraid all we have right now is tea and some rice."

"Sure," Syaoran smiled, still feeling unease in his stomach. Fujitaka wasn't usually so pale, was he? He turned a look to the princess. "Would you like to come with me?"

She beamed. "Of course I will! You've been gone for so long, I don't want to leave your side."

It was uncanny how much she could make him blush with such simple words. As Fujitaka moved towards the kitchen, he sent the boy a knowing smile, and Syaoran just blushed more.

Quickly, he drank the rest of his tea. "I-I'm done.."

"Me too," Sakura smiled, standing. "Is there anything you'd like in particular, Fujitaka-san?"

"Just the basic necessities. Whatever you two want," he replied, handing the wallet to Syaoran.

"Sure," Syaoran replied.

* * *

Syaoran and Sakura walked together in the market, the groceries in Syaoran's hands while Sakura chatted with him and with other people in the market. _At least she's having fun_ , he thought, though he couldn't bring himself to join in her fun. It felt like something was wrong. Syaoran couldn't tell why, but there was definitely something at the edge of his mind. Just out of sight. He just wanted to get home as soon as possible, to make sure everything was fine and that he was worrying for no reason.

"Are you ready, Sakura?" he asked the princess.

She hummed. "Yep!"

That feeling that something was wrong persisted in his mind though. He even looked around a couple times to see if he or Sakura were being followed. If they were, he couldn't tell. He tried to feel the atmosphere of the crowd the way Seishiro had taught him when he was younger. There was no aura around them with an intent of harm, but he stayed alert anyway.

"We're back!" Syaoran and Sakura called together as they entered his home. The feeling that something was wrong only intensified when Fujitaka didn't respond.

His brow furrowed as he walked in, looking around. _Maybe he stepped out?_ It almost pressed on him while he put the groceries away. Sakura stood outside of the kitchen, worry in her face.

"Do you feel that too?" she asked when he looked up at her.

"Feel what?" He did feel it, but he wanted to make sure they were feeling the same thing

Sakura shook her head. "I don't know. That something bad has happened?"

Syaoran put the groceries down, looking at her seriously. "Then there is something wrong."

Without another word, Syaoran looked around the house. Something was so wrong and Fujitaka wasn't there.

When he came to the other room, he stopped cold. Fujitaka was lying on the ground, a fews book and papers had scattered there around him, as if he'd tried to stop himself from falling by grabbing the desk.

"Dad?!" Syaoran went to the man, picking him up off the floor so that he wasn't lying face down. _Did he pass out or something?_

Fujitaka stirred, his face scrunched in pain. He gripped his shirt, then he looked up at Syaoran. He opened his mouth like he was trying to say something, but nothing came out. "Dad, what's wrong? Dad!"

"I'll go get some help!" Sakura said from above him and he looked up to see her rush out the front door.

Syaoran looked back to Fujitaka, who was breathing was too quickly. His face looked panicked, scared.

"What's happening! Tell me!" Syaoran clutched tighter to him.

"I- I…" Fujitaka got out, he reached up, grasping at Syaoran's arm. "I'm s- s…"

"In here!" He heard Sakura return, speaking to whomever she had brought with her, but he didn't take his eyes off of his father.

The panic in his face eased as he looked up at Syaoran. And then he smiled a small, mournful smile. "Syao- I-"

Then he said nothing else as his body went limp and his face vacant.

"D-dad?"

A couple guards came into view, gently pushing Syaoran back as they looked over Fujitaka. Syaoran let them, standing and staggering back towards the door. Almost immediately, Sakura's arms were around him, her face shoved into his shirt. He barely registered that fact as she cried, he couldn't take his eyes off of the far too still man on the floor.

After what felt like forever, but was only a moment, the guard looked up with a sympathetic expression. Syaoran already knew, but the guard said those words anyway.

"He's gone."

* * *

Syaoran sat on his bed, holding a book open on his lap. No matter how long he looked at it, he couldn't seem to actually read the words. He just felt like her should be doing something. He sighed, looking up at the house. It was the same as it had always been; tidy, but cluttered at the same time with pieces of history. Books and random objects littered the surfaces.

It was quiet, as it usually was unless Sakura came over. She always brought life and excitement to wherever she entered. This was a different quiet than was what was usually felt in this house. The usual quiet where the two residents poured over study, taking in knowledge and information. Now, the house was filled with silence. And Syaoran sat alone in that emptyness.

A knock from the door barely drew him out of his thoughts. He even considered not answering, pretending he too was not there anymore. Slowly, like his body suddenly weighed down by heavy bricks, he brought himself up and to the door. He opened it to his old mentor, Chimme, who gave him a sympathetic smile.

"I got here yesterday. I wanted to make sure I was in time," she said, gesturing in the direction of the service.

Syaoran didn't respond, simply nodded.

"It's going to start in a few minutes. Are you planning on coming?" she pressed when she didn't get a reply.

He looked up, trying to ignore the pressing behind his eyes. He hadn't cried often in his life that he could remember, and he hadn't cried since his father had died, but he could feel the need. Sakura had told him in these past few days that it was okay to cry. He knew that, but he held it in anyway. It was something he wanted to keep private to himself. He certainly didn't want to be weeping at the funeral.

He took a breath, then nodded once more. "I'll be there in a little while."

Chimme frowned, but didn't push it more. Instead, she gave him a hug, patting at his back comfortingly. "I'm so sorry for this loss, Syaoran-kun."

He was still until she pulled away, then he bowed low to her. "Thank you for your concern, Chimme-san."

She smiled, nodding in response. "I'll see you in a bit."

When she left, the house was quiet again. It was almost worse than it had been before. The silence ringing in his ears. He straightened his formal black clothes, and taking one last item, and made his way out the door.

He walked slowly to the outskirts where they put the people of the kingdom to rest, but he arrived entirely too soon. There was a crowd of black-clad people standing around, idly chatting; the casket closed, suspended above the hole in the ground. There were wreaths of flowers attached to a few of chairs, and draped over the casket. Syaoran suddenly realized that someone had planned this, made arrangements. It was typically something a family member did, but Syaoran was the only family Fujitaka had. And he knew he'd certainly not done anything. It must've been one of his fellow archeologists. He didn't know.

People offered him condolences and such as he passed by, making his way to the casket. He simply nodded, not having the emotional energy to form polite responses. He stood next to the case which held his father's empty body. The pressure began again behind his eyes. He didn't want it, so he pushed it away, refusing to let his eyes become bleary with tears.

Without a word, he pulled out the picture frame they kept on the table, of the woman with long, dark hair and a kind smile. His mother, decided so beyond the grave. Gently he placed it beside the fragrant flower arrangement. If they couldn't be buried together, then this was the least Syaoran could do as their adopted son. He opened his mouth to speak, to say his final words to his father before he was buried forever. Reaching out a hand, he touched his fingertips to the grain of the wood, wishing this all was just a nightmare. Wishing that at any moment, it would all disappear and he'd wake to find that his father was simply sleeping in the other room.

"Syaoran," a familiar voice said from behind him. He pulled his hand back and turned to see Sakura standing there, two flowers in her hands. She had been weeping, he could see from her swollen face. She looked like she wanted to say something, but instead she offered one of the white flowers to him. He took it, looking at her questioningly.

"You can put it on the casket," she answered his unspoken question.

Wishing to soothe the mournful look on her face, he smiled. "Thank you, Sakura."

Together they placed the flowers on the casket, then moved to sit in the seats.

It felt longer than it actually was, making Syaoran fidget through the entire time of Fujitaka's friends saying kind things. They spoke of his life and his career and that he was greatly loved. The spoke of his late wife and how he was with her now. And Chimme spoke of how he'd adopted Syaoran, as Syaoran had previously refused to speak. It was uncomfortable and depressing, the entire thing. All he could do was stare at the casket, prepared to go into the ground for forever. His heart ached within him and he looked down, fists clenched.

He twitched when he felt Sakura touch him, her fingers gingerly grasping at his hand as if to release the tension there. He looked up at her sad face and she squeezed his fingers gently, and he couldn't pull away. He didn't want to see he be anymore sad than she already was. So he just nodded, moving his hand to lace his fingers between hers.

Eventually it came to the point where the casket began to lower into the ground, carrying Fujitaka away from him forever. Syaoran watched helplessly as it disappeared from sight. The rest of the people there had gotten up from their seats, talking in a hushed tones to each other. Sakura sat with him still, holding his hand tightly. It was over, and the rest moved on, now paid their respects to Fujitaka, they could get on with their lives.

 _What am I going to do,_ Syaoran thought helplessly. _I'm alone now_. Fujitaka was really gone now, being buried with dirt right before him. _My father is really gone_.

That need to cry nearly overwhelmed him again, pressing at his eyes and filling them with tears. With trembling, he pulled his hand free from Sakura's.

"I- I'll see you later," he said in a rushed voice, standing from his chair.

"Wait, Syaoran!" Sakura called after him, but he didn't wait; he was already running as fast as he could towards his empty home. The tears already streaming down his face, blinding him as he ran.

At last he made it to his house and shut the door behind him. It was like a dam had broken within him, his body heaving in between his uncontrollable sobs. He slid against the door to the ground, hugging his knees to his chest as he wept in despair.

"Don't leave me…Dad…" he cried. "Dad, please…"

But he wasn't there, and he never would be again. Syaoran squeezed his eyes shut, wishing everything would just be back to the way it was before.

A knock at his door startled him, but Syaoran didn't move to answer it. He couldn't handle anymore condolences from Fujitaka's friends.

"Syaoran, are you there? It's Sakura," Syaoran heard from behind the door.

He couldn't refuse Sakura though, not even in this emotionally raw state. He tried to breathe normally again, wiping at the moisture on his face before standing and opening the door for her.

She looked up at him, and obviously immediately saw that he'd been crying. Her lip trembled as she reached out, cupping his face with her hand.

"Can I come in?" she asked tentatively. Syaoran nodded, moving to the side, then shutting the door behind her.

"Do you want some tea?" Syaoran asked, trying to push away the tears again to be proper, but Sakura shook her head. Without a word, she stepped forward and hugged him tight, her hands clenched in his shirt.

"You don't have to do that." She murmured against him. "It's okay to feel sad."

Syaoran's eyes widened, but then again he really shouldn't be surprised. She could always read right through him. His lip trembled as he leaned his face into her, clinging to her as she was to him.

He didn't even know when he'd begun to cry again, with his sobs muffled by her shoulder. They somehow ended up kneeling on the ground, Sakura's arms wrapped around him as she draw comforting circles in his back.

"What am I going to do…." Syaoran whispered between his cries.

Sakura tightened her embrace a bit, brushing her fingers through his hair softly. "You could come live with me, if you want? Come live in the castle. And then you won't be here all by yourself."

It was a big offer, one Syaoran was sure he would turn down if he were in a state able to make such a decision. He couldn't think about it right then though. The only thoughts in his head were of the person who no longer resided in this home with him. His hands gripped at the back of Sakura's dress.

"It hurts…" Syaoran murmured, the sobs hurting his chest as he failed to calm himself down.

"I- I'm so sorry, Syaoran," Sakura whimpered, and Syaoran could hear the hitches in her own breath.

After what felt like hours, Syaoran was exhausted. Sakura had moved them to sit more comfortably on Syaoran's bed. He was lying down, curled in on himself as Sakura pillowed his head in her lap. She idly combed through his hair with her fingers. On any other occasion, Syaoran would've felt the impropriety of this immensely, but he couldn't bring himself to care right then. He was too tired. He just stared blankly at the far wall of the kitchen.

"Does Fujitaka-san have any other family somewhere?" Sakura asked, almost apprehensively.

Syaoran blinked slowly. "No… not that I know of…"

He felt as Sakura's fingers stilled in his hair. "What…. will you do now?" Her voice was definitely apprehensive now.

"Take up my father's work, I suppose…" Syaoran replied, tiredly. He tried to swallow against the soreness in his throat.

"So… you'll stay in Clow country?"

Syaoran blinked slowly before looking up at her tear-streaked face. "I have no where else to go."

Sakura sniffled, then leaned down, folding herself to embrace him once more. Her hair splayed across his face.

"I'm really glad for that," She murmured against his throat. "If you go somewhere else, I can't be here to make sure you're not alone."

He shut his eyes, once more feeling the tears leak out from beneath his lids. He reached up, returning her disjointed embrace. "I won't leave you behind, Sakura. I promise…"

She pulled back, wiping his bangs back to plant a kiss on his forehead. Despite himself, he blushed. She usually reserved those for when he had hurt himself.

"I'll always be here for you, okay Syaoran?"

He smiled up at her, clasping one of her hands and holding it close to his heart. "Me too."

* * *

It was nearly sunset and Touya had had the bells rung already, but Sakura still didn't come home. Which meant it was time to take matters into his own hands. He rapped his knuckles against the brat's door, waiting impatiently for a response.

"You shouldn't be too hard on him today, Touya," Yukito said from beside him.

Touya huffed, but didn't reply. He wasn't intending to. He knew what it felt like to lose family, and from what he understood, Fujitaka had been the brat's only couldn't help but feel bad for him. At least when their father left them, he still had Sakura left. And Yukito, but that went without saying. The brat was too young to be left alone in the world.

Still, that didn't excuse Sakura _staying the night_ with him.

"Maybe they aren't here," Yukito said after a few minutes of silence.

"Maybe." Touya twisted the handle, opening the door. "But I'm sure he'll forgive us letting ourselves in."

Yukito laughed softly, following Touya into the little house.

Touya couldn't help the sigh of irritation at the sight. Sakura was draped over Syaoran, with his head resting on her legs. They were both dead asleep.

Touya shook his head. "They're getting too old to be doing this…"

"It's still really sweet, don't you think?" Yukito replied, smiling happily.

He groaned. He stepped forward to wake them up, but stopped, their faces making him pause. Touya had seen Sakura cry before; he was her brother, of course he had. The brat though, never. Honestly, Syaoran could probably get away with making people think he had no emotions whatsoever. He was so stoic. It was almost creepy. As he got older, that lessened a bit. But still… Now the kid's eyes were red and swollen, definitely an indicator of tears. Sakura had likely been trying to soothe him.

When Touya stopped, crouched beside the bed, Yukito came closer, his voice in a whisper. "Will you wake them?"

Touya sighed again in resignation. "Nah… but she's still not staying the night here."

"Of course not," Yukito laughed again. "What kind of big brother would you be if you allowed that?"

"Shut up," Touya muttered as he gently lifted Syaoran's head, pulling Sakura's legs to the side. He grabbed a pillow, placing it under Syaoran's head before setting him down once again. Touya was mildly surprised the boy hadn't even stirred. He must really be exhausted.

Untangling the rest of Sakura's limbs from Syaoran, Touya lifted his sister onto his back. She stirred, and Touya could feel her hand raise to rub at her eyes.

"Wha…?" she said sleepily.

"You fell asleep at the brat's house. I'm taking you home," Touya replied softly, not wanting to wake Syaoran, despite himself. The kid definitely looked like he could use the rest.

Sakura groaned in drowsy annoyance. "Don't be so mean. He's really sad his dad just died…"

Touya frowned, exchanging a look with the priest as pulled a blanket up to cover Syaoran with.

"Yeah."

* * *

 **A/N** : So sad stuff... feel free to review and rage at me about how awful I am... 'cause I know. I'm so sorry, but you know, Fujitaka died in canon so...

Anyways, I hope you liked it! I will do my best to get the next chapter up soon!

P.S. That last bit from Touya's POV doesn't really fit into the narrative of Syaoran's memories, but I added it anyway cause I liked it, so consider it a bonus/deleted scene.


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